Desperately seeking Cher

I’ve become a reoccurring Saturday Night Live character. And not a fun one like drunk sorority girl, someone more akin to Rachel Dratch’s Debbie Downer. The worst part is that I am aware of it – I’ve started to hate talking to myself. 

I’m sure you can relate on a different level. Imagine you have a nasty cold, one of those viruses that knocks you on your butt: you have no voice, your coughing endlessly, you can barely get your lungs to breathe. You want more than anything to be home, in your bed, with your mom serving you hot tea and hugs. BUT, you are at work, attempting to be productive (for whatever insane reason people go to work sick).  No matter what anyone says to you, it is really all about your flu. Sickness trumps everything and whining about it, receiving sympathy, helps you cope. Even if you manage to be productive, that bug is king until you are breathing easier.

It is the same for me, except it never freaking ends. So accept it and move on, right? Seven stages of grief and all, right? I have circled the wheel of grief so many times I should have a free ride punch card. This is the chronic illness bitch-slap: as soon as you accept it for what it is in your life, find a way to continue to be happy and productive, the disease changes the game. You get sicker, your meds quit working, your pain finds a way to invade yet another hour of the day. Pack you bags, you’ve been called up for another tour.

This is all to say that I am trying. I know that I am an obsessed, distracted and annoying friend. For my birthday last week, a soul sister posted pictures of the two of us in college. A time when we not only loved Clueless, we  were Cher’s alter ego, short skirts, doe eyes and all.  I feel like this illness has taken my Cher to the liquor store parking lot and kicked her ass. I look desperately forward to the day she gets back-up on her patent leather heels and walks, smiling, into the sunset…or the mall.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

The Littlest Rabbit

Just another WordPress.com weblog

National Pain Report

What You Don't Know Can Hurt You

SeasonedSistah2

Today is Better Than Yesterday

These Next 6 Months

It's all about perspective...

The New Melissa

Finding the new "normal" and creating a new life with migraine disease

Tissue Tales

My journey, navigating through life with a Connective Tissue Disorder.

Chronically Inspired

Rising Above Pain Creatively

intoxreport.wordpress.com/

'The Contra-Connoisseur’s Guide to Wine, Beer, Spirits And Other Stuff The World Got Right'.

Living Life As I See Fit

Because There is More To Me Than Just Rheumatoid Arthritis & Fibromyalgia

The Diary of a Happy Mom: 40 and Beyond

The trials and tribulations of an adventurous modern mom

Pain In The Mom

...trying to keep sane while in chronic pelvic pain

Graceful Agony

Living your best life in spite of having chronic illness and pain

grUBER FIT

Health, Fitness, Experience, and Adventure

Bucket List Publications

Indulge- Travel, Adventure, & New Experiences

Not From Around Here

Adventures as a Stranger in a Strange Land

Tea Time with Mandy

Only in Canada? Pity.

%d bloggers like this: